“I’m a Baffled Bridesmaid”

My best friend is getting married at the end of October and is obviously, VERY excited. She got engaged in December and by January 31st had everything planned and paid for, including her dress, the venue, reception details, DJ, etc. Then she found out she’s pregnant. Her due date is exactly one month before her wedding. This is her first child and I don’t think she realizes what having a newborn will be like, or what kind of complications might arise during the birth and following weeks. Her mom is pushing her to move the wedding date back a couple months but my friend won’t consider it. She even thinks her dress…

“I’ve Fallen for My FWB”

It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in three sentences or less, because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great, being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to go. Today we discuss what to do when you fall for an FWB, dating an ex’s friend, and loaning a significant other money.

“When Should I Tell Guys I Was Raped as a Virgin?”

I was raped about a year ago, as a virgin, at age 20. At 21, I still have yet to have consensual sex. At first, I was very affected by the rape, but a year later, I just want to put it behind me and have a normal sex life. I wast a virgin not for religious or moral reasons, but simply because I had not yet had a serious relationship. I really want to start having sex; I have a high libido and feel that I am missing out on something great, but I have been hesitant to get intimate with guys, because I’m afraid I will scare them away if…

What Lessons Have You Learned From Your Breakups?

I read an article the other day on the Huffington Post where women in their 40s share with women in their 20s the wisdom they gained from terrible breakups. The words of wisdom are great — “Like yourself more than you need someone to like you.” “Jealousy is not a form of love, it’s a form of control.” “Don’t confuse attraction with love.” — but do women really need to reach 40 before they can dispense, let alone gain, wisdom like that? I think not, otherwise my career as an advice columnist in her mid-30s is pretty screwed. No, I think regardless of your age, there are lots of lessons to be…

“We’ve Broken Up Without Really Breaking Up”

I’m 29 and my 40 year old boyfriend broke up with me a couple of weeks ago. To make a long story short, he misinterpreted a comment I made and in turn decided he no longer wanted to be in a relationship. Since then, we have been talking almost every day and have seen each other a couple of times. Even though he maintains that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship, when we are together it feels like we never broke up. We spent Valentine’s Day together and he said he couldn’t imagine not spending it with me, and that I make his house feel like a home. He even…

“I’m Jealous of My Man Magnet Roommate”

My college roommate is hands down the sweetest, funniest, most incredibly gorgeous girl I’ve ever met. Over the year, we have gotten very close, and I absolutely love spending time with her. The only problem is: every time we go anywhere together, guys immediately approach her and initiate a conversation with her, often completely ignoring me, which makes me feel undesirable and ‘second best.’ On top of that, numerous times I’ve invited my male friends over to our apartment, and they end up talking only to her, and continue to ask me about her for weeks after meeting her. The thing that bugs me the most about it is that she isn’t…

“Are All College Guys Jerks?”

I’m a sophomore in college. Over winter break four of my guy friends from high school tried to kiss me. The kicker? All four of these “men” are in relationships. Even if I’m sending some sort of subliminal “open for business” signal, it hardly seems right that they would approach even the most sultry of vixens (which I am not…) with the intention of cheating. I’m currently questioning whether I can trust any man — at least any man under 25 — to stay loyal in a relationship when I seem to serve as an overwhelming example of their willingness to stray. — Confused in College

“Am I a Scumbag?”

I started dating “Jane” about two months ago. We met on OKCupid and had a really good first date. Unfortunately, I’ve had to commute for work each week since then, but have seen her every weekend. At the start of January, “Carissa” came onto the work project that I’m traveling for. We had instant chemistry, but I fought it since she’s a coworker (and I was seeing Jane). Fast forward to end of January, and after a long night of drinking with the team, I ended up kissing Carissa in the bar at the end of the night. Things escalated rapidly from there — mostly just physical, but we carpooled to work…

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