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I have been a widow for two years and have been dating a man, “Eric,” whom I met by accident, for six months. I have three kids – two in college and one, 13 years old, still at home. Eric is not divorced, but he has been separated and out his house for over a year. I have not met his kids, which has been ok up til now. It is very hard on both of us when he leaves on his weekend to be with his kids. Out of respect we have been waiting for the divorce to be finalized. He has a very difficult wife who can make this process…

I’ve recently started seeing somebody who lost his best friend and nearly lost his brother in a car accident a year ago today. We’ve been together for about five months and other than the usual hiccups in a relationship we’ve done well. We’ve both promised one another to stick it out through the difficult times to form a strong, healthy relationship. We had a disagreement about five days ago and I’m wondering if his sudden need for space is because of his grief. He was supposed to be in the car with his best friend and brother the day the fatal accident occurred but decided at the last minute not to join…

Back in the 90s, when I was married, there was a guy I worked with whom I developed a crush on, and it lasted about six months. We went to lunch together, he made me mixed tapes, he bought me books, we talked a lot, etc., etc. I went to his apartment twice and to his office twice. We never had sex and our friendship was not romantic. But I know it was still wrong since I was married (10 years married at the time). We started pulling away from each other, and a month later I found out my friend’s sister had been dating him for a year. It is now…

I have a longtime friend who brings her dog every time they visit. I’m an animal lover, but my issue is I have cats and, while my friend seems to be mindful of her dog for the first half hour, after that I have to intervene to keep her dog from going after my cats, eating their food, or pooping in my house. My house is not very big and it’s not like I can expect for her dog to be leashed or penned up as she lives out of town and stays the night when they visit. My cats have a kitty door they use often when they go outside. They…

Sometimes when I get letters from people asking for advice, I know there’s more to the story than what’s been shared, and I try to get more details to help me fill in the picture and give the best guidance I can. I thought you all might like to see an example with this sort of behind-the-scenes exchange that definitely helped crystallize what the problem was… I met my husband four years ago through Facebook, and we just celebrated our first year wedding anniversary. Neither of us has a Facebook page anymore because it’s caused nothing but problems with his ex-girlfriends. They just don’t seem to go away even though they’re married…

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing now. Today we hear from “Not Interested in Being a Super Breadwinner” who wrote in back in September, 2020 about her concern that she made significantly more money than her boyfriend of six months and worried that, if they got married eventually, this detail might affect their dynamic and she would eventually resent “having to do it all” – “make the money, put dinner on the table, and be super-mom” to afford the lifestyle she aspired to. “I don’t seek an extravagant lifestyle,”…

I have been with my boyfriend for about two years. We are long-distance and see each other about once every month or two. We had plans for me to move to his location at the end of this year. Last year, we went to Las Vegas for EDC (the Electric Daisy Carnival) with a group of our friends (originally his). One of the friends, “Colin,” began to seem flirtatious with me. The second morning we all got back to our camping trailer, and my boyfriend, along with a few others, went to take a shower. Me, Colin and another friend, “Kyle,” stayed behind. I did not feel well, so Colin gave me…