And- go to your friends party, if only for a little while. Don’t wallow alone unless that’s what you think you need to do right now. Cut loose.

@lucia_la good for you. Sorry things went down this way, but honestly you are probably saving yourself months if not years of frustration and a bad or not fulfilling relationship.

How was everyone’s weekend? I don’t have anything too exciting. Saturday my FWB came with me to my hometown. My parents were out of town, so I needed to check the mail, feed the cats, etc. We also had amazing shower sex, so it was a fun day all around. Sunday we went to the goth club for a bit. Monday we went to a “croquet soiree” at his friend’s house in one of the historic districts. We also cuddled for like thirty minutes with no tv or anything, which was odd but nice.

And as I was typing this, my boss just called to tell me I’m getting a promotion. Yayy!

I had a really fun weekend, even if I am still really sad. On Friday several girl friends came over and we drank wine and ate cheese and watched/made fun of Ever After. Several of them brought me breakup gifts.
Saturday we had a brunch potluck and played D&D. It didn’t go as late as I would have expected, and my character got captured and stuck in ‘re-education’ pretty much right out of the gate (my DM says it’s my own fault for getting captured, but it’s not in my character’s nature to fight when she thinks she could probably talk her way out later), but it was still fun to do some role playing.
Sunday I went to see a movie with my ex and then rode 15 miles back from the theater, which was great, and yesterday I spent all day zoning out and watching Pushing Daisies with J, who has been super sweet in the wake of the breakup with Physicist.

Physicist and I have traded some text messages, and I’m trying to decide if I’m okay continuing in the relationship under the changed conditions. Half of me thinks it’s a terrible idea and that I’ll be miserable, the other half says that if I’m miserable I can always end it again later but maybe it’s worth a shot for the sake of staying in each other’s lives. Being around him makes me really happy. My two closest friends are in the ‘This is a terrible idea and I will not let you do this’ camp. I should probably listen to them. Easier said than done.

Thanks guys. He did respond to my message and apologized, said he’s trying to get to a better place with himself and didn’t mean to hurt me in the process, and said he wasnt trying to force my hand but understands that I’ve made up my mind. Which is pretty much bullshit since he gave me a bunch of reasons why we shouldn’t be in a relationship but made it so I was the one who had to verbally end it.

He had to drop off some paperwork to my work, and tried to have his roommate do it (I assume so he wouldn’t have to see me) but his roommate brought the wrong thing so I had to tell him to come in. We had a very awkward exchange. Mehhhh.

@mucha I think you’re right. If a conversation about exclusivity was that hard, I don’t want to imagine how things would go down with saying I love you, or talking about moving in together or anything like that further down the line.

@stone, you’re right. I’m definitely mourning lost possibilities more than the actual person. I’m still super depressed about it, though. Sorry to hear about what is going on with physicist. What changed so drastically?

Thanks guys!

@Stone and @Lucia sorry things are not working out. I really believe any sort of breakup when it’s been less than a year is harder than ending a long relationship. I think when it’s early on, you haven’t seen all the flaws or subconsciously realized how incompatible you are. You can tell yourself all these things, but it’s different than a long relationship where you feel it down to your bones that it isn’t meant to be.

@stone what are the changed conditions? If you don’t want to share, that’s totally fine. If someone decides to change their minds about something, it’s fine to say “this isn’t going to work for me”. It’s also okay to say “I’m still willing to give this a chance”, as long as you understand they will probably never change back to whatever conditions they had before.

@Veritek have you done drinks or anything with the one guy that just wanted to he friends? I want to say you had plans but had to cancel due to your back, but I couldn’t remember for sure.