Now I want to know the story of Ginger Beefcake.

“Cuffing season” as my friends say is right around the corner. I’m tempted to get back on Tinder, but I also don’t feel like dating. I like my FWB arrangements, but I feel a lot of pressure to date. Every week my mom tells me I need to put myself out there and meet some guys. I’m not complaining about being single or having problems meeting guys or being bored or whatever. The conversation will be about one of my friends (all of which are in serious relationships), and my mom will start asking me about what I’m doing to meet someone. I know she means well, but it’s annoying to keep being told how I need to find a nice Republican Southern Baptist boy since I’m not Republican or Southern Baptist. Election season in Texas is just not the sexiest time of the year.

I’m posting this question here because I know MG reads this thread occasionally.

Materialsgirl: How did your parents react about the wedding? Did you tell them before? After? Sorry if you updated before and I missed it.

How’s it going with the dates kmt and ver?

@kare, I know what you’re going through… my mom never said anything to me, but friends who were settled or in the process of settling down tried to push me to date when I wasn’t ready. It sucks! You’re totally fine. Don’t rush. Have fun. I’m convinced that by rushing things, you’ll end up with the wrong person and that by doing you, moving at your own pace, you will meet someone great.

Hey ktfran! You guys thinking of joining the club?

SOOO. I actually told my parents two weeks before. The reasons for this included that they had never met Radiostar, had not exactly been super supportive during the divorce, and weren’t really happy that I was dating him. My dad said that the timing was perfect because it was enough time for them to think about it, but not enough time to change anything. My mom had time to cool off and process. They have now since met him and we all had a really nice time and going up to Door County over Labor Day for a big family holiday.

His parents: Radiostar told his brother a few weeks beforehand and he was actually the one that seemed disappointed because he wouldn’t be able to do a speech, be there etc. We called his folks right after we had lunch post-wedding. I would definitely suggest having a wedding announcement (postcard) ready to go (just add a photo from the day) and have those printed while honeymooning so you can send them out to relatives and friends. His parents sent out a mass email to his extended family the day after we eloped so they were all in the loop. You just don’t want family finding out through facebook or something. Most of my close friends (and DW’ers obviously!) already knew our plans, so they were pretty supportive.

What I’ve come to find out is that most people really will want to celebrate with you in some way. We had an open house/bbq a month after we got married for Chicago friends. We’re going to have a pizza party reception for his extended family out in Westphalia on our 3 month anniversary. The night before, we’re taking out his parents, his brother and sister and their spouses, as well as his good friends and their parents from grade school/high school that are still in the St. Louis area for a nice dinner.

Another thing we’ve found? People want to give you presents even when you tell them you don’t want or need anything. So have a few ideas of useful items because for some reason, his mom is all about being fair and since she bought her daughter and her daughter in law their cooking pots and pans, she needs to give me some too (I have awesome ones so i’ve suggested knives or cutlery or something else). Anyway.. Yeah. it’s really not a bad problem to have

@ver – I’m sorry about the job, but it sounds like you’re doing really well. Fingers crossed for you and the job you like!!!!

Oh, MG, I was mostly curious how your parents handled it. I don’t know what made me think of it. I guess the letter Wendy posted today about the small, intimate wedding and the LW feeling slighted. I’m glad your family is slowly coming around. Good luck Labor Day weekend.

When we get married, parents, grandparents, my siblings and nieces and on the way nephew (any day now! She was due on the 23rd) will be there. I am slightly worried about the people who will feel slighted by not being there, but whatever, we can either go really big or intimate. We’re choosing intimate. It’ll seriously be a “hey, let’s get married in two months kind of thing… and we’ll get married in two months.”

A photographer is a must!

@veritek33: So sorry to hear about your job! But hopefully you get a new job quickly an then just have that extra severance money for fun stuff :). Still a crazy stressful time so it’s awesome you are taking it out at the gym!! I’d be eating bagels.

@ktfran: Dating has been meh. Went on a date with a cop who was super nice but we could not have been less well matched if we tried. Among the things:
-He has never had even a sip of alcohol (not a dealbreaker, but a little weird to ask to meet at a bar then)
-He doesn’t curse except at work “because that’s what it takes with those people” and he literally counted how many times I had cursed over the course of the date…WTF
-Told me he’s very traditional and he’s a-ok being the breadwinner and supporting his wife (not that it matters but I almost certainly make more money than him)
-Said it’s “really hard right now to be a white man” because ALL companies ONLY want to hire minorities (…I’m a minority…and at this point I was appalled)
-That his job isn’t “fun” anymore because the media blows everything out of proportion and he “can’t really police anymore.” And thennnnnn I was ready to GTFO.

The guy that I dated who dumped me after three months finally came over and helped me with some stuff around the house last night (assembling furniture, etc.) which was super nice of him to offer to do. I was plotting to try to turn this into a fun FWB hookup but I was legitimately having such a good time I didn’t want to make it awkward and be like soooooo want to make out? He’s not at all the guy to do that either so we had a weird lingering goodbye at the door and I was kicking myself after. I did send him a thank you text and said I would have invited him to stay for a bit but it was late and we were both tired anyway (with heavy winky faces). So at least I’ve floated it in general terms that I’d be open to some fun at some point. But feeling good that we’re able to be friends/friendly. I could ha ve cut the sexual tension with a knife though.

@MaterialsGirl: You wedding pics were SO GORGEOUS. Not to be a weirdo but your wedding was so my dream wedding…didn’t you go to Yosemite after? Ugh I would love that.

yup! went to yosemite.

Actually is up on borrowed and blue now. http://www.borrowedandblue.com/san-francisco/weddings/liz-jay