DW Community Catch-up Thread
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Oh wow @MG, you looked amazing… and I loved the place you had the ceremony, it looks very.. I don’t know, like OFFICIAL – we are adults here. 🙂 And you look so happy, really nice
Totally popping in to say, MG, your photos are beautiful! You look so happy. 🙂 Congrats!! I have been totally tempted to just do City Hall wedding myself someday.
MG you are stunning and your groom is so handsome! Lifetime wishes of love, health & happiness!
Thank you all , so very sweet. It’s pretty awesome to wanna just get married everyday. I guess that’s why they call it honeymoon phase?
Anyway… Tell me about fun or not fun dates! We should have some sort of post with date night looks. I wanna see what yous guys are wearing out!
This “it’s so hard to be a white man these days” thing is disturbing. My mom’s brother has been on that lately, it seems. He is a really young baby boomer, the last child of parents who really wanted a boy. They raised him with a boatload of white male privilege. My grandfather was a politically conservative businessman who told my mom she could either go to the religious college or the local secretarial school, those were her two choices. But her little brother could do anything he wanted and was constantly praised and celebrated. He grew up with conservative views too, and tragically doesn’t realize how racist and intolerant he actually is. So he’s been crying lately about the struggle of being a white man. I think what it really is is that people are starting to stand up and say “take your white privilege and shove it up your ass,” and that’s uncomfortable. A guy said literally that to him this summer at the airport, and my uncle *followed him to his gate* and tried to convince him he’s not racist, using horrible cliched lines like “I don’t see color,” and “my best friend is of color.” WTF!
You know who’s not bitching about the white male struggle? Guys who never were racist or sexist and actually perceived the struggle that women and minorities have dealt with.
MG, those photos are breathtaking, literally. congrats!
Dating has been really low key. I am “on the apps” but I swipe left more often than not. I’ve been talking to this guy for a week, which really feels like a month in terms of apps. He hasn’t asked me out, and I know I could ask him out, but I’m starting losing interest and I can’t tell if he’s cute or not.
I’ve never posted in this thread because it was at, like, page 80 before I really noticed it and it was too late to catch up. But I figured awkwardly interrupting works too.
@kmentothat, what a terrible date. You’ve probably already discussed this somewhere in the thread, but where are you finding dates? I’m just wondering how none of these terrible qualities were evident before you met the guy in person.
@materialsgirl, your pictures are lovely. A good friend of mine also recently eloped at SF city hall and her pictures are amazing, too. All the times I’ve been in the city, I had no idea city hall was so beautiful. It’s a great location. Congrats!Random, but last night I learned what that relationship status of “dating exclusively but not boyfriend-girlfriend” means. It means “I’m not seeing anyone else right now, but I want to be open to the possibility.” A guy friend told me he is dating this woman exclusively, but she’s had 3 DTR talks with him in the past month and she’s not his girlfriend. I was like, oh, that’s a thing now, right? And he explained. He was waiting for this woman he’d been talking to earlier in the day at the event to show up at the party so he could take a shot.
@materialsgirl lovely pictures! My parents got married at the old Toronto City Hall, and I think I would too. It has a lot of character.
@AndSoItGoes “Hard for a White Man” I met on Tinder and had a few days worth of very nice, respectful convo so it was a big surprise. He certainly was in no way rude to me but yeah, the things he believed were…not ok.
I’m feeling really, really low. Just had a cry. Holiday weekend next weekend and I have no plans. If I had single friends or more friends in general maybe I’d feel less lonely. I seriously hate that I can’t just date people for fun or sleep with strangers…if I don’t like you a lot I can’t even fake it a little and if I do it makes me feel more hollow. So it’s like I’m totally, totally alone, or going on a bunch of first dates only.
Lately I’ve been struggling a lot with self image (my date outfits are on point though, I will post sometime!) I’ve been tanning a lot, got more Botox, calorie restricting and working out a lot in hopes of losing weight (I’m a size 4 so I’m not huge), shopping like crazy for things that are as flattering as possible. I think because I have been cheated on by several people I feel that it’s because I’m not pretty enough or perfect enough and I’m now insanely hard on myself. Everyone that has dated me tells me I’m “perfect” and they don’t know why they don’t want to be with me, and they always want to friends after because they like me as a person. So I keep thinking it’s because I’m not pretty enough. I talk to my therapist about it but it’s just not something I can shake. Anyway here’s to hoping it’s something that I can deal with. I just sort of feel like I won’t feel lovable again until I stop getting rejected.
Hope everyone else is in a better/more fun place with dating, does anyone have good Labor Day plans? I’ve got a trip to Amsterdam and Rome in 2.5 weeks to look forward to 🙂
P.S. @Kate that guy sounds like a tool!
@kmtthat I’m sorry you’ve been struggling, but I wanted to tell you I totally understand and feel the same way. I have had almost the exact same experience, with guys telling me they really want to stay friends because they like me so much as a person but just don’t feel romantic feelings towards me. It’s so frustrating, so I totally get it. And I also am usually alone on holidays and feel that vast expanse of time stretching out in front of me trying to frantically make plans so I won’t be alone and checking social media all the time.
I also definitely feel the same way you do about dating – I can’t just date for fun or sleep with strangers so I also tend to go out on a lot of first dates and vacillate between that and hanging out with guy friends who I usually tried dating but it didn’t work out.
Anyway, just wanted to say I’m experiencing almost exactly the same thing so you’re not alone. If we lived close together I would love to get together over the Labor Day weekend! 🙂
When I feel this way, I find it really helps for me to focus on my friendships and the fact that I have a really good job, and also my passions (I think you do comedy? Am I right? That’s AWESOME and something I’ve been wanting to try for…YEARS now…but have been too scared!) – I know you probably know all that, but it’s something I have to constantly remind myself too. 🙂
No dates for me at all lately either. I spent the weekend giving a guy friend of mine relationship advice (whether or not to cut things off with his FWB – who by the way doesn’t *know* she’s just a FWB – because he’s met someone he likes more…fun times) and shopping with a guy friend/ex-boyfriend for clothes because he wanted help picking stuff out. So yeah, lots of guy time with zero actual dates. Fun! 😛
