DW Community Catch-up Thread

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    kare
    January 27, 2017 at 12:40 pm #671129

    @veritek your updates make me happy! I’ve mostly been lurking because December was a weird month, then I had a vacation in early January (which I spent half of too sick to do anything), and work.

    No major updates for me. My coworker and I ended things because we realized drunkenly hooking up just wasn’t satisfying. Everything is good with my FWB. He took care of my cats while I was on vacation and helped me get a new cat. After my childhood cat passed away, I decided to take one of the feral cats he tamed. The other male in the colony was trying to run him off, and without a safe place the feral cats are prey for stray dogs in his neighborhood. So we split the cost to have the cat tested for feline leukemia and FIV, vaccinations, and neutering. I guess I’m just on the crazy cat lady track in life, and I’m totally okay with that. 🙂

    My best friend’s ex fiance has this friend I barely tolerated when they were together. Picture a Southern Donald Trump with no money, and that’s this guy. He always “accidentally” groped me at bars if my FWB wasn’t there. And everyone defended it because he’s “just an affectionate drunk”. Ugh. That guy asked me out last week. I don’t understand why on earth he thought I would want anything to do with him since he has continually encouraged my friend’s ex to blow off their daughter. I turned him down repeatedly, and by the end I told him he was an appalling human being then blocked him.

    I’ve thought about getting back on Tinder or OK Cupid, but for now I’m just happy hanging out with my cats and having a FWB. And occasional hookups with the albanian guy I know – who does like his cocaine. But who hasn’t gotten drunk and let a shady albanian guy snort lines off of them? (That’s what your 20s are for, right?)

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    January 27, 2017 at 1:05 pm #671134

    @kare it’s so good to hear from you again! It sounds like your FWB is just a really decent guy and a good person to have in your life. And congrats on your new kitty! (Southern Donald Trump sounds awful and I hope you never have to deal with him again)

    As for me, another update but this one isn’t as fun. New guy got asked to interview for two jobs yesterday that he’d applied for a while back. One is in a neighboring state and the other is across the country. He told me about it immediately but it sort of puts a cloud over this date we have planned for tomorrow. I don’t want to get attached and have him move away but I also don’t want to cancel the date. So that sucks. I know it’s only two dates in but he seems to have some real potential and it’s just a disappointing wrench in things.

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    January 27, 2017 at 1:37 pm #671135

    @veritek – Don’t get discouraged yet! Interviews are nice, but he doesn’t have an offer (yet?) and even if he did, he might not accept. I know it feels like bad news, but hopefully you can wait until something more concrete happens before you feel discouraged!

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    January 27, 2017 at 1:51 pm #671138

    You’re right @Copa, it just wasn’t news I expected to hear! And he said he was about to quit job searching for a while because he hadn’t had an interview in months and now he has two in one week. Things change quickly I suppose!

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    lucia_la
    January 29, 2017 at 7:05 am #671280

    @kmtothat, how did the trip to Toronto go? Love hearing your updates too!

    Banjo took me to a nice Italian restaurant for my birthday on Tuesday which was very nice. Thursday he came to my comedy show and afterwards we were hanging out at his place and he kept talking about how much he likes me and saying he thinks I’m really special. I asked him if I could call him my boyfriend and he said of course! We had already discussed not seeing other people, but I hadn’t been quite sure of the label. Talking about him as “the guy I’ve been seeing” was getting old so I’m happy to lock it down 🙂

    Friday we went on a double date with my friend and her boyfriend and had some delicious sushi. Pretty much all of my friends are with someone right now (and have been for a while) so it’s really nice to be able to double date with them.

    I’ve been spending the rest of the weekend packing up everything I own to move to a new flat. I’ve been in this one for three years, and I used to be really close friends with my property manager, who also lived here. Long story short, he’s a manipulative narcissist and I’ve been thinking about cutting ties with him for years but he’d always find some way to reel me back in. He hasn’t lived in my flat for a while but we still had other ties (comedy group together and some business associations) but he betrayed me in a huge way in November and I’ve been working on de-tangling everything slowly but surely since then. I’m not quite sure if he totally realizes the ways I’ve cut him off personally and professionally yet. Moving out is the last step, and then I plan to send him one final message confirming I’ve given the keys to the new tenant (and mentioning that my business and business connections will no longer be working with him) and then blocking him on everything. My stomach has been in knots on and off for the last week as I’ve been lining up everything for the clean break so I’m excited to finally have this done and over with by Feb 1st.

    My new flat is a faster and easier commute to work, very close to a popular beer garden with gorgeous views of the city, and very close to another park with running trails that I will take advantage of multiple times per week. Annnnd it’s also a ten-minute walk from Banjo’s place. So I’m pumped. I’ve got a moving van coming in five hours so I’m just using this update as a quick break and then it’s back to work. Wish me luck with the rest of my packing!

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    TheLadyE
    January 29, 2017 at 3:32 pm #671320

    So glad to hear things are going well for everyone! @lucia_la Good luck on your packing and moving! Sounds like a great time for a fresh start.

    The younger guy & I went out again last night and had a grand adventure! I rarely go downtown, but there was a comedian playing at the comedy club we wanted to see, so we went to dinner, the comedy club, and then a jazz club for a cocktail afterwards. I’m continually surprised at his depth and maturity for how much younger he is than I am. It’s so refreshing to be with someone who encourages my dreams and really thinks deeply. (He voted for Hillary and he’s been very concerned, along with me, about everything that’s going on right now.) One of the things we’ve talked about is supporting local artists as much as we can – like, being even more intentional about it than before – so last night we made a point to go over and speak to the local comic who opened for the headliner and I bought his CD. (I probably would have anyway, he was hilarious, but still!) We were blissfully out and away from social media all night long so I didn’t even know about all the news until super late. Ugh.

    There’s a protest next Saturday near the capitol building – I’m thinking of asking him if he’d like to go with me. He’s very much an introvert (I am too, though less so than he is) so I’m not sure if he’ll find the crowds intimidating, but I think at this point he might say yes either way.

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    January 29, 2017 at 4:10 pm #671325

    Look at this fucking shit I just got in my email from some loser I’m not connected with and whose profile I’ve never seen. Oh, you don’t intend to use LinkedIn as a dating service? Then DONT, and please slam your head in the car door, creep.

    Hi,

    It was nice connecting with you on Linkedin. I was actually searching for an acquaintance when I came across your profile. I must confess you are pretty, very pretty and this is me being honest not just mere flattery .I hope no offence is taken, I understand this is a business networking medium and not a dating or social networking website and I don’t intend to use it for one.

    You caught my eye, I am interested in communicating more and sharing more about me with you and hope to learn more about you too that is if you are single and interested in communicating further. I do believe everything is possible if we put our mind and heart together just like i believe that good things can be found in the least places. Let me know if you’re willing to communicate more and I will write you to tell you more about myself.

    Warm regards and hope you are having a great weekend.

    Danny

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    kare
    January 29, 2017 at 5:28 pm #671330

    I’d report him for harassment or whatever option is available on LinkedIn. That’s what I did when the guy that sexually assaulted me tried to message and add me on LinkedIn. Creepers gonna creep.

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    January 29, 2017 at 5:32 pm #671331

    Oh, good idea.

    But actually what’s really creepy is that he didn’t message me through LinkedIn, he emailed me directly, so he’d have to know my personal email address. Which is NOT public. His was a gmail address like [email protected]. But I don’t know who he is on LinkedIn or if he’s even on there – there are 5 profiles with that name, which could be a made up name anyway. Super creeper.

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    January 29, 2017 at 8:17 pm #671360

    Oh, that’s creepy! And odd — how did he get your personal e-mail? I wonder if there’s a way to track the e-mail address it came from? A friend of mine actually met her boyfriend on LinkedIn, but it wasn’t creepy like this.

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    kare
    January 29, 2017 at 8:46 pm #671364

    Ugh what a creep. I’d definitely block his email address. Maybe try googling his last name to see what it brings up? Maybe there would be enough dots connected to figure out his LinkedIn or any other profile and block. It might also be worth reaching out to LinkedIn and asking if there’s any system issues that could have caused your email address to be made public. I know LinkedIn had a recent security breach. Plus you could ask if they can block any user associated with that email account from contacting you. Doesn’t hurt to ask.

    One of my coworkers got hit on from Yelp. Yelp. But one of my other coworkers met his girlfriend on an online video game. So I guess increased online presence is a double-edged sword.

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    January 29, 2017 at 8:53 pm #671365

    Yeah, I may look into it more. Like if it was a legit attempt to connect, why wouldn’t he message me through the app so I’d know who he is, or at least link to his profile? For now, my husband just replied to the email and told him he knows who and where he is and not to contact his wife or any other women in that manner. That seems to work with creeps. They back right off when a man steps in. Pathetic but true.

    I bet he’s mass-emailing a lot of women. Lmk if you all get one!

    It annoyed me because I am starting to look for another job and I’d like the process to be as bullshit-free as possible.

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DW Community Catch-up Thread

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