I think pets can be a deal breaker. If I badly wanted a dog or cat and the husband had a strict no pet policy, we wouldn’t have been a good match. Or vice versa. The husband I and fall into the no pet category, so we’re good.

For me, personally, I’m strict no cats because I’m allergic. I can last about two hours in a house. I couldn’t date someone who had, or was planning on getting a cat. I could handle a dog, but if I was with someone who wanted a dog, he’d have to do the dog walking since we live in a large city and picking up and discarding poop makes me gag, literally. My throat is closing just thinking about it.

So, pets aren’t always a deal breaker, or major, but I think they can be depending on the person.

No pets would be a deal breaker to me too, but I also wouldn’t particularly want a dog. So pets but certain pets. My husband wasn’t a huge cat guy until he met me and now he matches, if not exceeds my enthusiasm. To me pets may not be a permanent thing, there may be a time when I don’t want to add to the brood but I couldn’t be with anyone who was adamantly against the idea forever. They are a pretty decent commitment in time and money so I think both partners need to be on board. Plus your pet is a member of the household and they deserve a minimum of respect and care from every member.

Anyway as part of that I completely understand kids being something you don’t want to compromise on. They are a huge commitment and they too don’t deserve someone who is ambivalent about their existence.

My BF and I are in a rock and a hard place with pets. We both want one…it is just what. He is allergic to dogs and cats, and I am more allergic to cats with no issues for dogs. So preference for dogs. However he has yet to find one that isn’t overly taxing on his allergies. He really like samoyeds and I have gradually become a fan of these glorious land clouds haha Again, like Hfantods, no time soon are we getting one. But I can see in the future us pursuing that option.

As far as pets go, my dog and I are also a package deal and while I would hope a man would love her like I do, I would/will take full responsibility for her because she’s my dog. Any guy who doesn’t want pets isn’t for me, and frankly wouldn’t be even if I didn’t have my dog now. I will always love dogs and always want to have one, most likely.

Speaking of which, a guy once refused to even meet me for a first date because I have a little dog. He said he wanted “a dog that can do a job, like an Australian or a German shepherd.” Ook. You live in an apartment downtown, bro. What’s the dog gonna herd…your drunk friends into an Uber? (I put that into a comedy set, actually!)

So yeah, pretty sure me not wanting to take on someone else’s kids isn’t that unreasonable.

I have to disagree that a difference in politics is necessarily a deal-breaker. I am on the far left and my husband is firmly on the right, and I find the difference in opinion refreshing. He regularly expands my worldview and we never run out of things to talk about. Sometimes we change each others’ minds, and sometime we have to agree to disagree. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who always thinks exactly the same as I do. I could certainly see how it could be deal-breaker for many couples, though, especially if they’re unable to respect each other’s opinions or if there’s a difference in morality (it’s hard to imagine anyone but an alt-right racist loving an alt-right racist), but I’ve never been happier.

If I lived somewhere that wasn’t in the city, or I had fenced in yard, I would totally be ok with a dog, although I’d have to look into more low key breeds, or get one that’s a few years older. Anyway, if I were dead set on having a dog, the husband and I wouldn’t be married. He’s anti-pets. Period.

So, someone like he and Copa wouldn’t even go on a date. Which is fine because they each know that about themselves. Since I’m ambivalent about the whole thing, I could go either way depending on circumstances. Deal breaker for him. There’d have to be talks with me.

Also, this is silly, but I’m irrationally afraid of cats. I think they are going to claw my face off. And they sense that about me which makes it worse for both of us.