DW Community Catch-up Thread
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Yeah, I remember about him. How did you hear about him?
The guy I went out with (I’ll call him Trail guy, because he is super sporty and this weekend ran 21k trail): we have a date tomorrow. He is super nice, but I kinda have the feeling that he is looking for something serious. So, we’ll see.
Ah, got it. Still not ready for serious? That’s totally fine. Anyway, if you’re unsure if you’re looking for the same thing and don’t want to waste your or anyone else’s time, you can always tell him where your head is and see how he responds. (You can also ask him what he’s looking for, but I guess I find the opposite approach — “I’m just getting back into the dating scene and not looking for anything serious right now” — a bit less awkward than putting someone on the spot.) Hope you guys have fun either way!
Definitely not ready for serious. But I’ve always thought that happens when it’s not the right person. Anyways, we’ll see how it goes
Possibly! Though I think bad timing makes anyone the wrong person. For example, a friend of mine met a guy on Tinder this past winter. He had ended an eight year relationship sometime last year. After a couple months of dating, they became exclusive. A couple months after that, she wanted to introduce him to her sister and one of her oldest friends who was coming into town. He freaked out, feeling like they were on the fast track to marriage, and realized he wasn’t ready for serious again. So they broke up. My friend was so sad. Anyway, I don’t think she’s inherently a bad match or the wrong person, but she’s ready for serious and he wants to play the field. So she’s not the right person. Anyway, let us know how it goes!
Today’s date is over. This guy is really cool. Kissed a lot. I don’t know what to do because I like him but I reeeeeally don’t want to get serious but he seems like the kind of guy who is really nice and boyfriend material you know?
I think that the way to keep it unemotional is to keep dating other people.
But like I was the expert, I’m not, this is actually my first date from Tinder but it went really well.
@Ale I dunno. I do have some friends who have dated guys long-term without getting overly emotional or invested in it without dating others. You can keep dating other people, too.
Unrelated, but last night a friend and I were talking about our exes’ moms who we liked and missed post-breakup. When I got home, I looked up my first serious ex’s mom on Facebook. We didn’t keep in touch and I don’t social media snoop often, so aside from occasionally hearing about what he’s up to from a mutual friend, I’ve really had no idea. I guess he got married last month! I don’t feel anything negative about it, but I’m a bit surprised. We broke up when we were 25 after several years of dating, and even though I know people change and mature a lot in their 20s, he was so immature and entitled. So even though there’s good chance he’s not like that anymore, it’s how I remember him and it makes me think… who’d wanna marry that man-child!?
Hey everyone long time no talk! Just skimming the last few pages to catch up. Copa hope everything goes well with this new guy. And I hear you on caring that their place feels “adult”…no soap and hand towels is such a headscratcher (he just…rinsed and air dried? Or didn’t wash at all?!)
Things are ok with me. Since January bf and I found and bought a place, moved and lived together for the first time, I spent 4 months interviewing for and ultimately started a new job, and went through the devastating loss of my father. It’s been…a lot. and harder since he travels Mon-Thur (and sometimes Sun-Thur), though he made a huge effort to be very present back home while my dad was declining in his last month. I’m just looking forward to things mellowing out, because all of that is so challenging for a relationship. We’re planning a trip to Costa Rica for our 2 year anniversary and it’s impossible NOT to wonder if that’s when we’ll get engaged (we’ve talked about marriage, he asked my father, we have a 3 year timeline on kids since I’m about to be 34).
Anyone else go through weird vacation anxiety when hoping for/anticipating a proposal? I hate surprises and I feel like no matter how it happens I’ll know it’s about to happen, and he wants to make it a whole thing. Since he’s meeting me in London in three weeks (I’m there for work) and we are meeting friends in Paris over the weekend I already have friends saying TEE HEE maybe he’ll propose in Paris! Which man I don’t want ot get my hopes up and be unnecessarily sad if he doesn’t. It’s just people TELLING me “oh you’re going on a trip, he is sooo going to propose!”
A little over a year in, the husband and I went to Napa for a weekend getaway. I was pretty sure he was going to propose. While out at dinner on the second night, we were sitting at a bar, taking a break from wine and enjoying a beer. Of course, we were a little tipsy. Or maybe we were both drunk. He asked if I thought he was going to propose that trip. I said yes. He said he wasn’t. That was that and I figured it was going to be a few months down the road. I wasn’t really that sad, because I knew it would happen eventually. He proposed two weeks later at his house about a half hour before we were headed to a gala at MSI. It was perfect. And I was totally surprised!
He could propose in Paris! Or if he was smart, do it when you’re least expecting. Although, a lot of my friends have gotten engaged on trips to Europe.
So my best advice, don’t put too much pressure on the trip and tell friends to lay off.
If you need tips for your CR trip, let me know, I live there. I could plan an awesome proposal in a candle lit dinner by the beach haha.
