@Karebear181 – K’s daughter has been on school holidays for the last few weeks. That, along with winter, a lot of rain. and a few days of lockdown, have naturally led to much less opportunity to get together with her. I avoided one social invitation but accepted the second one for drinks with our mutual friend. I’ve been going to a different dog park that’s closer to my new house and only going to the old dog park on the days I know she won’t be there. So far she has no idea that I’m avoiding her as she’s been so busy with school holidays.

K says she has ended things with the married man, for the 3rd time. She blocked him but he found her on snapchat and has told her he is suicidal, his life has no purpose and there is nothing for him to live for now that he has lost her. She has “seen the light” and now wants him to work things out with his wife and has no respect for him and his inability to take control of his life and choose happiness. She doesn’t want him even if he were to leave his wife for her (which he still says he won’t do).

I have finally worked my way through my thoughts and have decided my real issue is not so much her sleeping with married men, which I can put down to (in my opinion) a judgement error, but her refusal to feel any responsibility for the potential consequences of sleeping with a married man. Her disrespect and nastiness towards the spouses, her disregard for the potential upheaval of their children’s lives if the wives found out. Her “not my problem” attitude is what has changed how I feel about her as a person.