Dear Wendy

I’ve heard rumors that NYC will be doing this starting tomorrow.

Breaking news: nyc public schools closed until
At least april 20th.

People here acting like it’s a snow day too, stuffing themselves into bars and restaurants like it ain’t no thing. We are so fucked.

Hey Mark, it might be good for your mental health to step away from the internet or at least this site for a bit? I get that you’re infuriated that people who are following the news are scared and that all the hysteria is disrupting your life in really big ways and you’re worried.

I don’t want to argue about why the aggressive life changes being implemented are justified and really necessary And that no one takes any of this lightly or is clueless about the impact all of this is going to have on the most vulnerable among us – financially vulnerable and physically vulnerable. So if you want to argue, please go elsewhere for that. Or else let’s agree to disagree and hope to God in two weeks you can tell us all you told us so – the hysteria was ridiculous after all and totally unwarranted because this was no big deal because so few people died.

Thank you for starting this thread; I hope you don’t mind, but I changed the title a little to reflect a broader scope of coping with the pandemic. I’ve also pinned it to the top of the forums so it’s easy for people to find. Let’s use this thread to share our ideas for staying stimulated at home, keeping our kids entertained and educated, and how to cope with the anxieties, fears, and frustrations many of us are and will be feeling. Humor is also welcome! We’re all in this together, guys, and we WILL get through.

I called one of my close friends last night who is a primary care nurse at a VA clinic in chicago. They are building an emergency clinic to treat the ill when they arrive (no confirmed cases yet, but they know it’s coming). She’s receiving training, including how to suit up in the hazmat like suit she’ll have to wear to treat covid patients. They have thousands of patients, most of whom are in high risk categories, and she’ll be on the frontlines treating them. I’m worried!

I haven’t followed this thread as closely as others so I may be confused about some details, but my understanding is that your fiancé was living at home with his parents and sister when you two started dating and for most of your early relationship. Then he moved in with you and when you decided you wanted to get married, he suggested you wait six months so as not to step on his sister’s toes since she’d just gotten engaged. And then when the six months were up, he proposed but and pretty much agreed to whatever you wanted, wedding-wise, until his sister expressed rage, at which point, he just sort of cowered and let you deal with it. Is that right? And you are really, really angry at his sister, who I guess lives near you all (meaning, your lives are going to be intertwined, whether you like it or not) and saying you’re going to skip her wedding come hell or high water and the first month of your engagement has been stressful and miserable because of her, and, I’m just saying there’s a lot here to unpack. A month is a teeny drop in the bucket when you’re talking about a lifetime together. This is going to be your family, and it sounds like it’s a family that has not established clear boundaries as four independent adults. And some of that – a lot of that, really – is on your fiancé. Counseling can help address some of this. The pre-nup suggestion is based solely on the fact that he was living at home as an adult to save money and then moved directly in with you, without time in between to be financially independent and you should just protect yourself.

So: no, not doomed. But there are some wrinkles here that need a little ironing before you legally tie yourself to your fiancé and, by extension, his family.

She’s 30+ and still lives at home with her parents? Just out of curiosity, did your fiance live at home with his parents into adulthood, too? That could explain some of the dynamics at play here.