hfantods
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It was my guy’s friend’s birthday party last night and he invited me to go. I hadn’t met this group of “friends” before so I was a little nervous. The birthday friend was really nice, chatted a little, very extroverted, unlike me and my guy. There were a few other nice people too.
But as my guy explained a little before, and I understood after, that the other people were mostly acquaintances of his and he was there for the friend’s birthday really. His friend is part of this foursome of couples and the girls are also close. My guy’s always felt a little excluded from this “group” and I felt sad hearing that. I mean yeah, they are all coupled off, but one guy of this “four” was actually kind of a jerk. While getting his drink from a table near us he asked “… so, are you guys dating or something?” in a really awkward and dismissive way. There are other things to talk about! And this guy’s fiancee was one of the nice girls! Ughh. And yes, these are all first impressions. There were few other people outside this 8 so it was fine but damn.
I’m a bit socially awkward too and have felt “out” in parties, but I hated seeing my guy feel like that last night. I’m glad I went though with him and at least met his friend.
@Cleopatra_30, yeah! It’s been four months. He says what he feels in the moment all the time, which is what I meant when I wrote that, but I don’t think it was spur of the moment; as in, we had been cuddling for a bit and listening to good music, and at a certain moment he said it. I think he meant it as a whole. Strangely (?) I felt comfortable with it, because I knew he was saying what he felt and he wasn’t requiring anything from me.
Haha shoot, I missed that thread. I don’t know if he straight up identifies as an atheist, but I asked if he was more atheist or agnostic and he said atheist. He said he’d be open to going to church with me someday. He didn’t go to church at all as a child, so it wasn’t something that he grew out of or decided not to continue. As for me, it wasn’t a dealbreaker that someone not be the same religion as me, but as this progresses, it is different applying it.
Yay Copa! Happy to hear about good dating stories. What does BCB stand for?
One of my guy’s friends is having a birthday party Saturday and I’ve been invited. I haven’t met this group yet. It is a bunch from undergrad. My boyfriend told me they party pretty hard. I’ve actually never seen my bf really drunk before and vice versa (tipsy, yes). So I’m a little nervous about it all but I’m glad to meet more of his friends.
I’ve written a bit about my doubts before. There are a lot of hormones and feelings abound but overall I like him. I never thought I’d go for the blonde puppy dog type. He’s been so kind and affectionate. I just feel safe with him. We have fun. I don’t want to use him though and that’s my fear. I do plan on checking in month by month on my feelings and I’ve given myself a six month deadline to really decide. But part is some heavy stuff that I don’t know about yet like if I want to raise children as Christians. I’m Christian, pretty progressive, but I go to church once a month. He’s an Athiest. We’re both accepting at this point but I know religion can be a huge deal and I don’t want to deal with it later. To this point though I just wanted us to get to know each other and it’s taken me a bit because this is my first relationship ever.
He told me he loved me just before Christmas. I think it was what he was feeling at the moment. I told him I liked him a lot and also I didn’t know what to say. He reassured me he wasn’t expecting anything. We’ve continued to text and see each other normally (getting back into the swing of things after holidays).
@veritek33 awwww, yay! I’m so happy for you 🙂
@Cleopatra_30 I think my friend (well, friend who is on social media) has that breed of dog. Oh my gosh, so FLUFFY.
That dress looks beautiful on you @TheHizzy!
I have to admit I’m not a huge animal person. I don’t hate them but I’m super awkward around them. I didn’t grow up with pets. So I’m hoping if and when I meet my bf’s family dog it’ll be ok and like not a deal breaker if it goes really bad, ha ummm.
NYE has never been that big for me. But I had a chill night at home with my bf and it was nice! We played board games and watched TV. Oh my gosh, we are boring. NYE is still not a big deal but a new year’s kiss is fun.
Yikes… I have to say I never remember when there are parades and road closures in my city and it can be a pain in the ass. Maybe he should’ve looked it up before but I kind of empathize. BUT did he then text you that he just couldn’t come anymore/reschedule another date?
Oh a belated congrats to you @TheLadyE on your stand up performance!
Yay, have fun! And I hope the work conference went well this week.
That’s so exciting Hizzy!!
https://www.reddit.com/r/OkCupid/comments/7hzktm/pretty_sure_im_getting_faded_out/?st=1Z141Z3&sh=13b2709d Ugh wow this guy seems exactly like C.T.
The key is to in good faith set up an alternate date which in your case is Sunday. That shows your interest. And if it bothers him, what Hizzy said. He also should know that it’s just date 2.
I usually went copa’s route of LinkedIn then Facebook. It’s only a light scan to make sure they exist. I am pretty Googleable by first name, occupations and city which I don’t love but what can you do. My Facebook (public and private) profile is very boring and locked down. I could change my name on that but haven’t felt like it either.
Messaging in other social media platforms is a bit weird and creepy. I like to keep the pretence that you haven’t googled the person.
On a somewhat similar train, how/when do you exchange last names with your online dates? One guy just asked on date 4. My guy asked on date 3. We were in a woodworking store which had some business card holders. He joked I could put my card there and in a “Ted Mosby, architect” voice said “[first name]–what’s your last name? (I gave it to him)–[last name] [occupation]”. I thought that was pretty smooth, haha, but I suspect he may have googled me before and caught himself. I sure googled him but asked him to confirm.
My boyfriend’s grandfather passed away this morning. It was somewhat unexpected except he became really sick in the last couple days and my boyfriend was going to visit him tomorrow after he flew back. I told my bf I’m here if he wants to call from the airport. I’m not really sure what I can do at this point, if anything, really.
So exciting to hear, @missdre!
Yay, really happy for you @copa.
M.G. is away for work now and even though we only really see each other on weekends, I’ve been weirdly missing him. I guess 3,000 km will do that to you.
