Kate
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Yeah, you probably should talk. It’s pretty unlikely that a guy who’s a bachelor well into his 50s and enjoys that lifestyle is going to marry. As for the “laptop lifestyle,” I don’t know. I and many of my colleagues work remotely. So does my husband. And we take vacations, sure… we go to Mexico for two long weekends and a full week. We go to NYC to see a show. I go with him to his conferences in warm places. But… I actually have to work. Like, hard. And go to a lot of meetings. I don’t think it’s too common to find a job where you can just be wherever you want doing whatever. He’s very lucky.
It sounds like in order for this to work, you’d have to find a way of achieving the kind of lifestyle he already has. Or he’d have to marry you and/or provide for you to at least some extent, and maybe you do some part time thing like report writing or whatever.
But right now it’s not matching up and one of you would need to make changes for this to work. So, talk. Have a little chat about where you both see this going.
Thank you!
Ohhh, I think I know what BGM was thinking of, the Wendy letter on the main page about the engagement ring (I was only looking at forum posts). A lot of people thought the LW made bad decisions and said so, while others thought he was a good friend, and so there was debate. Plus, anytime engagement rings come up, you know the discussion will go on and on.
I personally was bitchy on that letter, maybe even as bitchy as BGM often is. I think I was day drunk and it was my last day in Cabo before going back to freezing weather and the holidays. But that LW is a longtime regular and it didn’t scare him off.
That’s right, or when they keep replying “but whyyyyyy,” or they’re just wacky like Sarah b and start threatening people.
I don’t think there are enough cases of a man writing in about something that’s unique to women, like pregnancy or periods, to draw conclusions, but I don’t think they’d get piled on unless they were being insensitive about it or had the wrong understanding and women who’ve been through it are eager to set them straight. If a woman wrote in about ED, she’d probably get the same reaction if she was being insensitive or wrongheaded about it. Otherwise I think people would just tell her their experiences with ED.
I went back over a month, what do you want, a year? BGM literally said “lately.”
This Matt P letter reads to me like a run of the mill “this relationship is toxic, and since you can’t deal with what she did, you have to move on.” There aren’t even enough comments for it to be a pile-on. Someone like Jeanine30 got way more flak when she wrote in about her own sexual history.
http://dearwendy.com/topic/i-cant-come-to-terms-with-something-she-did-before-we-were-together/
Well, there was a lot of heavy news you were dealing with.
I dunno, I see 4 guys that wrote in in the past month: Matt P with the girlfriend who slept with a lot of guys, peraltro whose gf dumped him, screensinger the guy who had the chick freak out on him after sex, and, crap, I forgot the other one already, but everyone was pretty nice and generally took their side. No piling on. A lot of guys who get written in ABOUT get piled on in absentia, I guess.
Oh the other one was about why does she keep leaving me and coming back, posted by Wendy. Plus a fifth guy, Aaron (I’m guessing it was a guy) who wanted to know what to tell his dad about not going to church.
I agree in this letter there was piling on, but it all seemed to be from moms.
Lil bit.
Ok BGM, but it sounded like you were saying that even though we had the opinions of a bunch of women who’ve given birth and must have received a doctor’s opinion about travel, we still needed someone knowledgeable – any medical professional – to weigh in. Then you said you hate dumb women. I knew you like Carrie Fisher and Wendy, both of whom are/were smart women but are not in this thread.
Look at this shit. My co-worker was saying this was the flight right before hers:
Oh yeah, for sure a pregnant woman should not be required to fly out of the country for work in third trimester. It may be more complicated with dads, because equality, but I can absolutely see the father-to-be agreeing with his boss that he won’t travel by air after 4 weeks before the due date. Or if it’s car travel, just short trips.
And since someone will want to go there: what if Dad has a job? That requires him to take business trips? That are more than 300 miles away? Should he not travel at all during Mom’s third trimester? I’d say it depends. We all know how awesome US companies are with being flexible for dads. So maybe he still has to travel but can cut it down to what’s absolutely necessary. And Mom may be worried and stressed when he’s away. After she’s 36 weeks, I think there would be a good case for him to tell work he can’t be out of town. If she had a complicated pregnancy, or had one last time, then definitely, no work travel. That’s reasonable.
