Kate
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Let’s not do this, please. You both have made some points, but now it’s just fighting between a teen and a millennial. It’s not uncovering anything new of value.
I went back and read your earlier post. It does sound like you have a potentially debilitating fear of being alone, and the intolerance of porn seems like it’s about needing a guy to prove he’s 100% devoted to you, with eyes for no other women? That kind of jibes with the lack of female friendships you talk about. I’m definitely not a psychologist but those two things seem to go together. So then after your breakup (he did end up moving out, right?), you find yourself spending time with this 50 y/o married skeeveball because you don’t want to be alone and haven’t developed healthy female friendships or other good ways to spend your time. Does this make sense? Is it a path you’ve explored in therapy?
You do sound really really young, but that could be an effect of having been through Covid isolation at 12 years old, overprotective parents, neurodiversity, and whatever else. It sounds like you’re trying!
Can you link to the Reddit post please?
No, I probably wouldn’t be able to get into a relationship with a snorer. I have too many lifelong issues with sleep. If my spouse started snoring like that after we were together, I’d have them get checked out and look into all possible solutions. If nothing else worked, I think we’d have to sleep in separate rooms, but that would suck on vacation. Once I had to share a room with my aunt who’s a heavy snorer and I literally did not sleep at all. I think the next night I slept on a cot or the floor in my parents room because all the other rooms were taken.
And @theladyE, they should be talking to you about those risks. It may be why they put you on that lower-dose pill. For me it was because I was 35+ they put me on a different one to lessen the risk of stroke/clotting. I think that’s true for everyone, normal weight or not.
And then a few years ago I was having other weird alarming issues that i honestly can’t remember right now, so I just stopped taking the pill. I don’t know if it’s really understood or recommended to have women taking it continuously for years in their 30s and 40s. Probably not the best option for everyone. An IUD might be better.
Since I went off it, my period came back heavier, more frequent, and with more mood issues / pms, but I haven’t experienced anything weird or scary. It’s like, at this point how does the risk of me actually getting pregnant compare with the risk of a serious health issue.
In my late 30s I had a few of those “ocular migraines,” not a headache but the shimmer aura for a half hour and messed up vision. One day I got to work and had some kind of aphasia where I could read words but not make sense. I thought I was having a stroke. Looking back I’m sure this was the pill. They had put me on a lower dose but still.
Oh dear. That’s sad.
I have noticed some young women, maybe interns, maybe not, wearing extremely short dresses, like probably that’s just what they own / are used to wearing and they don’t realize. I think for the guys it’s easier and if they don’t have a lot of work clothes they can wear the same outfits on repeat.
Yeah I was at lunch Friday with two people born in this century. One of them (21 y/o intern, the son of one of my peers on an adjacent team, comes across like he’s 14, has ADHD and can’t stop talking) was telling me all his fave movies though, and they’re all from the 80s and 90s. This kid… Friday was his last day and after lunch my friend who supervises him had to go pick up her kids from camp, so I was joking that I was going to give him a ton of stuff to do. But then he was sitting next to me talking nonstop about all his favorite sub-reddits 😭 and showing me memes on his phone. He went to the intern goodbye thing but got bored after 5 minutes. I told him to go home. It truly is like babysitting a child who’s a handful. That said, our intern last year was an absolute superstar and we’ve hired him.
It struck me how there are people on my work team now whose mom I could easily be. Not just if I had a teen pregnancy, but if I had a kid at 25 or 26. And it doesn’t seem that long ago that I was that age and going out 3 nights in a row.
Sex education AND access to effective contraceptives you can get without involving your parents.
