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I’m engaged to be married in eight weeks but am beginning to have cold feet. My fiancé treats me like a true queen, but he can’t provide for me the way a husband should because of his finances. I’m a school teacher making $34,000 a year and my fiancé currently works at a warehouse job making about $12 an hour. He also has a six-year-old son whom he has joint custody of and pays child support for, which leaves him with a small paycheck. We split all our bills and sometimes he asks me for some money here and there to carry him to the next pay period until I barely have…

New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. It’s time again for Shortcuts. For every question, I’ll give my advice in just a few sentences because sometimes the answer to a person’s question is so obvious and the need to hear it so great that being as clear and frank as possible is simply the best way to…

I’m having an affair that my husband knows about; the problem is my boyfriend doesn’t know about my husband because we live a few cities away, and it’s getting complicated. It all started three years ago. My husband and I had money issues, kid issues, boredom issues. I felt crushed by the stress of a youngest child who had disorders, was labeled special needs, and needed my care on a constant basis. One night I was invited to a party where I met Jim. Jim was smooth and nice and caring and so care-free — the exact opposite of my own life. We fell in love, and he has no idea that, after…

Earlier this year my boyfriend’s father committed suicide. At the time, “Jake” and I had been together about a year. Jake’s parents divorced a few years ago and his father’s family likes to blame Jake’s mother – they claim he never got over her — for the suicide even though his father remarried in October of 2014. I guess getting remarried to a woman they all love counts for nothing?! One of the most difficult things – more difficult than dealing with the death – has been how Jake’s family has betrayed him. Jake entered the military in 2003 after graduating high school, and they seem to be angry at him for…

My fiancé and I have been struggling recently with the whole sexual part of our relationship. I’ve had a really bad experience in the past that also happened to be my first time, and I am still getting flashbacks. Not to mention, I have zero desire. Also, I don’t approve of his watching porn. I’m overweight, and for him to look at naked girls and get pleasure out of it is cheating to me. Also, back to the experience before: That guy used to always have the Playboy channel on, which also contributes to flashbacks for me. I hate it. I want to help him out and not make him feel bad…

New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog. Read some of the most popular Dear Wendy posts here. If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), do a search in the search bar, or submit a question for advice at wendy(AT)dearwendy.com. I’m a mom of four who’s been dating this guy for four months now and things seem to be going well. My only concern is that he hasn’t met my kids yet. I don’t know if this is really a concern, but it pops into my mind a lot. I’ve…

In 2010, I had lunch with an ex-boyfriend from many, many years ago that developed into a relationship even though he was still married. His wife had asked him for a divorce years before; however, they had decided to stay together until the kids went to college, and I met him three years before they did. The wife found out about me, and they agreed to separate on condition that the children NEVER meet me. We have now been living together for five years and the children (now 19 and 20) still don’t know about me, and I am told they never will. I am 58, he is 63, and neither of…