But what if you decide to be exclusive, you try kissing and you have zero physical chemistry? Or worse, he is a gross kisser?
I’ve dated men I loved the look, idea, mind etc of but we just didn’t have that chemistry. And I think actual physical chemistry is really important.
I’m not trying to pile on here, but why is a kiss taboo? A chaste kiss on the lips?
It just seems like he wants you to make an emotional commitment before you will truly know whether it’s all going to work.

I would probably consider it a red flag, I think veracityb. Especially if it’s a first date, or they are claiming to want a “real” relationship. I’ve for sure rushed into things many times with mixed results. I guess it would depend on the delivery.
I am so thankful that I’m an old and never Internet or app dated. It must be really tough.

I think I would find it hard to comprehend why he would be stalling, @Kate. I mean, why spend all the effort in meeting up and spending time with her if he wasn’t really interested? But then, I confess I’ve never really seen this behaviour in guys and as such, so I kinda have to assume the reasons TheLadyE gives are legit.

Yeah, you see, trying to push things further than kissing or bringing up the possibility of sex after a first date seems like the norm now, but seems..rather umgentlemanly to me. I don’t much like it, and most of my long term relationships began as friendships, or the guy was keen on a relationship before sex came up. So..confusing as to it’s redflaggedness.

I’d say not in itself a red flag. Just maintain your boundaries.

Hm. Well, I guess it won’t be long before she finds out, and I do hope it works out this time. To be honest though, how is one supposed to know that that person is going to like that when you first connect? In other words, how do you go about not choosing these people if they’re the ones you’re drawn to?