Kate
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I agree they’ll probably sneak around and do it anyway, but at least they’ll give the appearance of complying, which is what they should do out of respect for your home.
Yeah, Dave, what everyone was saying was the right advice, and I think you should pick one of those scripts and use it. If you don’t, he’s going to want to stay with you again at some point in the future, and if you haven’t set the stage that the house rules are the house rules, it’s going to be more difficult for you. Either you’ll have to say no, which is going to be really hard to do if you didn’t try to enforce the rules the first time, or this same scenario is going to play out again. You’re coming across as way too passive doormat here.
I always did first dates on a weeknight, and if I wasn’t feeling it, I’d finish my drink, pay, and be like, “well, I gotta walk the dog. Great to meet you! Take care!”
I also might check the sex offender list online, just as a precaution. Lives with mom, watching women, getting neighbors’ numbers just to sext them… if he’s been charged with something and supposed to not be bothering people, you could report it.
Oh man, don’t give your number to guys who sit outside smoking and watch you. You can just be like, I’m flattered, but no, thank you. Do not go out with him. If he asks you again, say, nah, I think we’re all set.
I don’t mean to make you feel bad, but if a guy who lives in your neighborhood and watches you all the time, starts sexting you, the right response is no response. Saying you’re not comfortable talking about sex so early says you see a future with him in which you will be cool with talking about sex. At most I’d text back, “ok… i think we’re good here,” and then delete his number. But even better, just stop responding. He’s a creep.
Yes, it’s fine to just bring it up casually. People ask me all the time if I have kids or want kids. Total strangers. It’s a very normal question to ask after a few dates. What’s their position on kids. Do they have any? Do they want any? You should pay attention to what’s in their profile though… if they say “definitely want,” I wouldn’t waste my time, knowing I probably didn’t. My profile said “maybe someday” or something, and I was 36, so I think it communicated “probably not.”
You guys ever go to business networking events? My friend and I went to one at this fancy “Innovation Center” near MIT that has a networking night every Thursday with free drinks. We found a little space over by a window and kind of faced outward and just talked to each other for a few, laughing a lot. Pretty quickly guys started coming over and talking to us. We met a bunch of them, and the ones we gave cards to are emailing and trying to get drinks. I guess they don’t notice rings, but whatever. Anyway, it ended up being really fun. And free wine.
Well, you know, no one on here seems to regret their decision either way, right? I personally don’t know anyone who made the decision not to have kids and regrets it, though I guess there’s that community of regretful parents. That could just be because most people DO have kids and not a high percentage choose not to. But do what’s in your heart!
Yeah, my friend who plans on having kids said she went to a panel event where female CEOs were taking questions. Someone asked about how on earth you get to that level with kids, and they were like, “nanny.” I think anyone famous for sure has nannies, and they make it look easier than it is. The working parent thing has become such a freaking racket in my opinion. Way harder than it was in the 80s and 90s and so much more expensive.
Yep, I heard the same about Italy and Albania!
Yeah, must just be from the US. Thanks GOP!
I hear tickets are cheap these days! My parents have a place in Europe, and the tickets they got for this Spring cost about half what they normally do. The flip side of the travel ban bullshit, I guess.
