Kate
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She did say she would like to get physical with him and then kind of see what happens from there. There’s nothing wrong with this being a lust attraction kind of thing and really just wanting to have sex. It might not be that important to spend much time getting to know him. If she told us she’s interested in a boyfriend relationship, not something casual, I would say really take the time up front to figure out what type of guy he is. But maybe who cares.
Right, you’ve been able to observe his behavior, and the result that other girls’ behavior seems to have, and you don’t want that same outcome. So the simple answer is don’t be like those girls unless you want to hook up and get dumped quickly, right? So that might actually mean NOT approaching him, at least not overtly. Maybe it’s more like trying to just have a normal casual conversation with him either in class or at a party.
It’s interesting that when I asked what you want, you put it back on him and what you could expect from him. Be careful about that. Really think about what you’re looking for. A boyfriend? A FWB? Casual dates with different guys? And act with that in mind so you’re less likely to settle for whatever a guy will give you.
Sure, maybe he’s nice and humble, but at the end of the day he’s a super hot, very young guy who’s well aware of his desirability. He’s got endless options and you always see him with different girls, not settling down with anyone. He has no reason to. If you want to just hook up with him, that’s probably relatively easy to do. But I would suggest trying to get to know him better, to figure out if you really like him or you just like the idea of him based on what you see from afar. But the reality is, it’s probably not realistic to expect a guy this young and this hot to give anyone his undivided attention.
Well, I guess what do you want here? If you want to go in a date with him or make out or have him sit with you at lunch, you know what to do, follow these other girls’ example. If you want to date him and be his girlfriend, that doesn’t seem to be in the cards right now, as he’s certainly enjoying all this female attention and doesn’t need to make any effort at all.
At least try smiling at him and saying hi. You’re not getting anywhere by looking away. After you look away, look back and make eye contact. Smile. I think it’s okay to seem a little flustered, but obviously with a guy like this you have to make some effort.
Cool, it looks pretty in the ads but also sheer.
How’s the coverage on that?
I will say, going in the office makes me feel more like a real person again. A person in the city who does things. And I have an old personal friend who I helped get a job at my company and it is her first week and first time in the office so we met up and chatted and gossiped.
I was wrong, I guess it just became optional to mask on the T, but interesting who’s taking the option. Almost no one in my office wears masks. Originally you had to be vaccinated to come in, but now it’s open.
Masks are still required on the T in Boston. But today there are a lot of men not wearing them, while all the women I can see are masked.
Right, what happens when there’s groceries in the fridge that have to be cooked but you’re too busy or not home yet or not feeling well? If you do ever move in together, he should commit to taking some basic cooking classes, or cooking with you so he can learn how.
I agree, “can’t cook” is unacceptable. I can understand maybe not loving to cook, but like, that’s how you frickin feed yourself and others. There’s no excuse. It also doesn’t really add up with his “I live at home to help out” positioning. Sounds more like he lives at home to get taken care of. I’d be highly suspicious that a person who can’t cook doesn’t pull their weight at all in a shared household. I think “can’t cook” is a red flag of being lazy, weaponizing incompetence, and probably holding onto outdated gender roles.
I cook the stupid Hello Fresh meals because it’s a nice transition from workday to evening, but my husband can cook too, and can jump in and make the meal anytime. His mom taught him to cook because people need to cook, and then he worked in restaurants. It’s fine to have one person be the primary food preparer if that’s how you like it, but everyone should be capable of cooking a meal.
