anonymousse
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My answer changes to: DANGER DANGER RUN AWAY!
OMG!
So London/pearl white is not a man asking about his gf? I’m so confused.
Did you tell her you went to a third party to talk about it?
Good for you. Maybe next time you should talk to your gf first…
Yeah, your friends are just jerks.
I mean, you sound like you are keeping score and feeling bitter. It’s your birthday. And you’re what- in your thirties? It’s just not as big of a deal to them anymore. I think your expectations are too high. They have more responsibilities than you do. That’s just the way things are.
I mean, right around this time of year, while I’m planning for the holidays, child birthdays, presents, trips, snow tires for two cars, and looking at our credit card balance it’s like…no going out and spending a lot on drinks I will regret tomorrow is not on my list of priorities.
There’s nothing personal about that decision.
Have you explicitly texted them, no kids this time? Otherwise maybe they think your silence is permission.
Preach, Ele4hant. (The long post on the previous page.)
I always appreciate a thought out response that doesn’t insult a huge portion of the population.
People make different choices. Lindsay, your personal choices have led you not to have children. That’s okay, but the reality is you don’t have as much in common with these friends anymore. It’s really easy to say that your friends that are parents don’t care about you enough, or are assholes because they don’t go out enough…or you could choose to look at it with more forgiveness. They don’t have as much to give right now. You can choose to meet them more than halfway, or cool down these friendships.
(And statistics show us that opting out of children is and has been on the rise since the nineties.)
Priorities change. I mean, they have kids. Things change when you have a family.
If you want these friends to celebrate with you, make it easy for them.
Asking people to take part of their precious weekend, buy a gift, and/or a bottle of wine, uber and spring for a sitter is a lot of money for most couples.
If you really want to see the friends without the kids, just ask the women out for drinks at a drinking establishment at night on a Thursday or Friday. Your husband could suggest all the dads get together at the child friendliest house/food place and eat pizza and watch football while the kids tear the place apart.
Did you come here to vent and complain or for advice?
You could use your words and ask them to leave their kids at home. BUT as one has already responded, and four others have said, they can’t do it without the kids.
There could be a million different reasons why. The reasons don’t really matter, but your friends have told you they can’t come to your party without their kids. If you value their friendship, it might be worth it to make some accommodations rather than offend all of them.
You could look for a kid friendly restaurant, park, museum, or maybe you could even come up with a more creative idea. What if you made some space for the kids in your home, and asked them to chip in for a sitter and kept the kids separate for the party?
I have two kids and I really appreciate it when friends make it really easy for me/us to spend time with them.
No one said you concocted an evil plan, but your instinct was immediately to hide the truth, ask others about it and keep lying.
That’s not really what a supportive, trusting partner normally does.
I think you should apologize, tell her the truth and let the chips fall where they may.
Is your gf an addict?
I don’t know, you should ask her.
