ktfran
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Wishing for a quick recovery! And for you not to get it @copa.
You and I have very different experiences here, but I know it’s neighborhood-based. People in the West Loop and downtown are definitely not wearing masks. I am. But most aren’t. We’re sticking to a few neighborhood places that we feel fairly ok at and want to support because of that.
Talked to my just turned 16 year old niece a few minutes ago. She was worried about the school board meeting this week because they were making the decision on whether or not to mandate masks. Teachers and students were for a mask mandate. Parents were against. Teachers and students won!!
This is in southern IL, right across the Mississippi from MO.
Regardless, what’s done is done and this is where we’re at.
Idk if I agree with that @fyodor. We knew there was a huge part of the population that didn’t want to get vaccinated. They should have waited until the percentage of vaxed people was higher than it was. They wanted a win and they wanted people to stop complaining about masks. It’s truly not hard to wear them. I was annoyed when they lifted the mask mandate and I was basically right. I’m not a medical professional, but I understand people.
Airlines are even more lax than they were a couple months ago. And this was while delta was on the rise. EDT, a friend was on American Airlines two weeks ago and not even the flight attendant had their mask over their nose… so how could they enforce others to comply?
CDC fucked up too as far as I’m concerned. I went for my annual check up last week since I missed it last year. My doctor and I were talking about masks and I mentioned I mostly wear mine still, especially in stores and traveling. She wasn’t happy when CDC said vaccinated people didn’t have to wear theirs because frankly, the US has shown us people shouldn’t be trusted to follow appropriate guidelines. My sister also works in the medical community and the doctors at her practice basically said the same thing.
Anyway. I’ll probably wear mine for a long time to come, and maybe forever on public transportation.
Does it really matter why he lied to you? I’m going to say this again, because it bears repeating, this is who you married-someone who doesn’t really care about you or your feelings. If you are unwilling to leave, you need to accept his as he is. So because you know this is who he is, what’s the point of checking up on him? Catching him in a lie? It just upsets you. If you’re going to stay married, you need to find a way to get over it. I’m being serious. One of you has to change. He’s not going to. So you either have to or you leave.
I was thinking about you the other day Tina and wondered if you finally left. I guess not. That’s a shame.
If you want to decline the situation, do so. Don’t worry about what’s happening at the beach house. His parents will probably see through the “friendship” anyway.
Personally, I’d love to see how they all interact around your husband’s parents. Or around you. You do know people who witness them probably feel sorry for you. Or pity. Wondering why you don’t see what they see and leave. Don’t you want people to look at you and think “Wow, what a strong woman. Her husband is a cheat and a flirt and she got out. Good for her. I applaud her!”?
I highly doubt his desire to spread his seed and produce an heir has diminished, so I’d say he’s still looking for more fertile women.
Maybe I’m wrong.
@Sandra, ,to @Kate’s point… I never did well in on-line dating (I did so briefly years ago) or on first dates where a friend set me up. I don’t know why I didn’t make a good first impression. I was kind of shy and awkward, especially if it was a date. I was never the life of the party. I’m not the person people gravitate towards. However, I’ve had a lot of relationships lasting anywhere from six months to several years and now am married. Each person I dated, I met through work or mutual friends or activities and it was because they got to know me a little first. I do much better w/ familiarity. I know this so I play to my strengths.
Anyway, maybe you have a similar problem so should try to meet people other ways. Or maybe there is something else, like your profile or possibly come across as really wanting an LTR off the bat. I dunno. Food for thought.
“I will say that I never have been the “flirty” type. That other post brought up that thought, wondering if something I’m *not* doing might be an issue.”
No, Robert, it’s not anything you’re *not* doing. That’s not the issue. I can tell you your issues. I’ve been telling you your issues. And I’ve also told you that you need to work with a therapist to overcome those issues. Nothing we, this community, or a date will tell you can change the outcome you seek.
Here are but a few:
1. You’re stuck in a 1950s fantasy. Example: You want a beautiful, late 20-soemthing or early 30-something woman with long hair to bear your children so you can have picture perfect holiday outings. Life is messy. This is not life.2. You’re too stringent. Example A: Everything thing we’ve been telling you and you refuse to acknowledge, instead telling us why we’re wrong and you’re right. Example B: You refuse to update your way of communication to this century. Women don’t want someone who doesn’t appropriately use technology. Example C: You explained your dating semantics to @Copa explaining why, again, you’re right. First meet / first date… basically the same thing. Geesh.
3. You think the women you date owe you. They don’t owe you an explanation. of why they don’t want to go on a second date. Full Stop.
4. You haven’t had a relationship in years and you no longer have friends. It’s likely because you’re too set in your ways to actually be a good friend or partner. See item #2. HUGE RED FLAG.
You are doing something to turn people off. It’s something deep within you. You need a therapist to work through it.
@Copa explained how therapy should be approached much better than I did. Everything she said, 100%. Thanks for going into better detail!
@robert, you’re missing the entire point of therapy. You don’t collect data, visit a therapist, present your case, leave with a list of things you need to fix so you can appeal to a potential mate. Therapy is self reflective, learning about and working on issues that keep you from living a full life.
You have a mental block that is keeping you from growing as a person. Your inability here to fully grasp what we’re telling you is proof of that.
We spent pages and pages telling you why women don’t owe you an explanation of why they don’t want to date you. Women are not data points. You can’t seem to move past it though. You also can’t seem to move past the unrealistic expectations and ideas you have about life in general.
Frankly, you’re a walking red flag. We’ve listed so many reasons why. And yet that’s still not enough for you.
Serious therapy.
