Why has he ghosted me?
- This topic has 54 replies, 13 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 2 months ago by
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Hell yes, his wife found out. Most likely she gave an ultimatum about dropping you, or being dropped by her. Next time (god forbid) be honest with yourself about your/the other guy’s motivations, and be prepared for this to happen if you’re not more discrete.
You’re the one who mentioned (more than once) that the two of you were having intimate talk, so don’t be calling us disgusting and sordid for referring to something you wrote.
But anyway, emotional affairs are about emotional intimacy, not physical intimacy. You had a deep emotional connection with him that both of you were hiding from your spouses. It’s not appropriate to have that kind of emotional intimacy with someone when you’re married to someone else. It’s cheating, you were both wrong to do it, and he realized that and put a stop to it.
Google “emotional affair.” You’ll find the description very familiar.
Your reaction to this is very odd. It was an emotional affair. It’s not shocking that when two married people get really close and have intimate conversations (including about romantic interest between them), it might end at some point. He either got caught or came to his senses.
Your whole thing where you act like people here are being ridiculous is BS. I think you know that, or you’re delusional.
You’re right. What you have done is disgusting. You “told” your husband about it. Show him the conversations and see how he feels. Then write back about how the divorce proceedings are going.
Does anyone know how to delete a post and their member account here? I feel too bullied here and just want to remove everything 🙁
Jules – you asked a question, you got the answer. No one is saying you were sordid. No one said you had an intimate affair. Take a step back and read without ego.
He confessed to you that while he was happy in his marriage, you were the “one that got away”. That’s intimate. That’s emotional. That’s a dangerous thing to carry around in a “healthy” marriage. For the sake of his marriage he realized that this was not healthy for him.
Leave him alone.
I just want to leave this website. I’ve not pursued him. I haven’t gone looking for him. I haven’t sent him any messages. In fact I have completey left it. Thankyou for your honest answers. It’s all over with now. How do I delete all this?
There isn’t a way to delete your post, but you can go ahead and log out and leave the site if you want.
Oh dear lord. Maybe you should obsessively text your guy friend to deal with your feelings of being bullied aka, being told the truth. Then you can see what bullying is when his wife responds. Also google advice which will tell you that it isn’t just what you want to hear, it is the actual honest truth.
Good God, Jules. When you have, by your own admission, intimate discussions with a man and he tells you that, although he loves his wife, he should be with you, rather than her — what do you honestly think that means? Where do you think he wants to carry things? That’s not very subtle code for “if you say you’re willing, I’ll leave my wife and join you” — said in a cowardly way that he can always fall back on “but I explicitly told you that I love my wife” if you aren’t willing. I’m sure that’s how his wife read it. If you were looking at things with wide-open eyes, rather than basking in this guy’s love for you, you would have seen it too.
You obviously are offended by JulieCatherine’s suggestion that you were planning to get together with this guy to worship the great God Priapus. From your reaction, that apparently isn’t what you were overtly thinking. From what you wrote, it almost certainly is what he was thinking. Why? Old friends wanting only to catch up with you, renew a friendship, and have mutually enjoyable conversations simply DO NOT EVER tell you that although they love their wife, they should be with you. How could you miss that? Did you miss that?
This is like a Hallmark narrative turn Lifetime narrative thats been dropped. Your old friend “fling” got busted by his wifey. Use commonsense. You knew what you were doing and you knew what he was doing. Quit playing poor stupid little ole me script. I dare you to show this to your husband, I DARE YOU.
