Poppy
Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
If tipping stopped at places such as restaurants then the cost of the food would go up due to having to pay servers a salary base. I would rather tip servers then pay for over priced food. You would cone out better and so would servers. Also, @kate i was a server/bartender as well a while ago and its considered stealing when one comps food/beverages without the approval of a manager. Usually when someone does this without managers approval its cause they want you to give a nicer tip. The hook up is really more or less I want a bigger tip. I agree with the rules of service tipping as well. The only one i do not agree on is the home health services as home health providers to me is not a tip service job its a medical service provider job and most people that require home health are the elderly and disabled who are on a fixed income. So I wouldnt suggest anyone giving a home health employee additional income without the approval of the home health agency and also most home health providers have policys that forbids them to accept gifts from their clients/patients. This is to protect their employees from accusations and to protect the clients/patients from being taken advantage of.
An 18 year old is not a child. They are considered adults by society’s standards. Well America’s standard anyway. Just because you percieve 18-20yrs old as children does not mean they shouldn’t be treated like adults. If a 19 yr old wants to date whatever age person then they have that right as a human being. Who cares about the maturity level…yes there is that maturity level there but its irrelevant because everyone matures differently…women usually mature sooner then men anyway. Im sure most young adults would take offense to being called a child when they are in fact adults. I would take offense if I was 19 being told im a child. @lucidity i have male friends just like as you described. To say its creepy that a late twenties man is dating a young adult is creepy is ridiculous. Him lying about his age maybe red flaggish but then again its only a big deal if you make it more tjen what it is. People lie about dumbshit all the time that doesnt mean they are awful people, sure a character flaw but common on.
Hes right that many women his age might have kids and being 29 sorta limits his options if he is not wanting to be a step parent. There is nothing abnormal about a 29yr old dating a 19yr old. They are both consenting adults and if she wants to look past a 10yr age gap then thats her business. The only problem I see is the maturity levels that each will have to deal with. Especially with busy body friends who think something scandalous might be going on. Come on, a 10 yr age gap is not REALLY OLD …. no were near old. I’m 31 so what am I the grim reaper?
If her example of small things is her lying in bed while S/O is getting ready for work asking him to take the dog out is her main complaint then i would say she is the problem. If she was up cooking breakfast and asked then theres an issue that would need to be addressed. I think LW isnt holding up her weight and S/O is rightfully so, annoyed and pissed. If LW would rather find work then im sure there are jobs that would pay her under the table.
LW, sorry not sorry. I work 40plus hours a week, my husband works 60plus hours a week, I deep clean my home every Saturday, get laundry done, we alternate dinners, we take our trash to the dump, and have two dogs that need potty breaks as well. Its called adulting. You were saying??
@Ron, EXACTLY. This so called fantasy has turned very concerning, quit frankly a bit creepy. Sure we all might have fun fantasy crushes but at what point do you remember specific incidences over a 9yr time period of flirting with a person that you can give estimated time frames and what actually occured, and on top of it she had been in a serious relationship. Unless LW keeps a journal….. Idk, thats unusual. The fact that she is willing to kill her career over eye contact is concerning about where her mental state is. He hasnt made a move in 9 yrs nor are there indicators to say he is interested per her narrative. If this man made a move on her she would be all over him.
@J_D you have known this man for years and have gotten to know him on a personal level. You know he has a wife, you know her NAME, you probably know his life story, and assuming he may have children, etc. However, here you are wanting others to tell you its okay to want to have an affair. NOPE, not gonna happen! Where is your empathy, your morals, your conscious? You know his wifes NAME!!! That alone should make you say bad idea. More or less you sound like you want to be a homewrecker. Lets say he is flirting with you and giving you the “eye contact”, you dont initiate back unless you want to be that women child homewrecker. Doesnt matter if he is happy or NOT in his marriage. Marriage is hard but it is beautiful and rewarding. Some people fall weak in their marriage that opens the door for fools to engage. Dont be a fool. Also, you need to reflex on your personal life. Single then single now. Youve been eyeing this guy from the get-go. The way you word your narrative sounds more like fantasy… Get a grip.
Its important to have adult time, especially if you are a parent. However, like others have pointed out, children are costly. These parents have to buy bday gifts, Christmas gifts, gifts to other kids bdays, buying new clothes constantly, med bills that accrue, extracurricular activities for their kids, etc……they have a lot going on on top of their bills. Your birthday is on the bottom of totem pole for paying for a babysitter or paying for the whole family go out for dinner. Hell, it would cost a family of 5 to eat at McDonald’s about $30 if not more. Double that to $60 at minimum for a restaurant. Say theirs 6 couples in your group and you celebrate each persons birthday this way then it would cost that family of 5ppl $720 a year to eat out on everyones bday.
No its not to much to ask for. Go out with the couples who will not be bringing their children along. All you have to say is “Hey guys, blah blah celebration on xyz night, adults only if you would like you come, no exceptions.” You can also see if the couples with children wouldnt mind hosting at their homes so everyone can be there.
LW, the symptoms you describe do not sound significant enough that I would jump to the conclusion that she is on drugs or drinking excessively. Like the others have said, its time to sit down with g/f calmly and tell her the truth. A good relative would intervene appropriately, not cowardly.
Call the relative up and explain to them that you dislike the position they have put you in and now you would like proof of their claims other then their word and be honest with them that due to what they have said ypu will have to disclose who you are as you must now confront your girlfriend about what has been said. Also, what health issues resemble signs of addicts because if she has what appears to be addictive behaviors then she is on drugs or abusing alcohol, which ever it may be. What are her behaviors? Have you looked for signs such as needle marks, burnt spoons or missing spoons, signs of drinking outside her body language, square foil, constsbtly sniffing and touching nose, etc….. Someone finances is not an indicator of an addict and symptons of depression are not signs of an addict. Those can be factors to addiction but that’s not solid proof.
LW, how about research signs to look for on heroin users, cocaine users, and alcholics. That might help you. Cocaine and herion are serious drug choices. Herion is very hard to quit once your addicted. Same with alcohol. Even with rehab and interventions people still slip. Its a constant battle to stay clean. If your S/O isnt invovled in out patient treatment or supportive groups and has normal behaviors then this relative is being dramatic. Sure your S/O could have tried cocaine and heroin once before and could have had her share of drunken nights but that doesnt make one an addict.
