Dear Wendy
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Bacc is no longer welcome to comment on this site, either in the forums or in the comment section. Women have to put up with creepy comments like his enough in other places on the internet and offline; he does not need an additional platform, that is supposed to be comfortable most of all for women, to spout his creepy, predatory, anti-women rhetoric. Good-bye, Bacc.
Well, this sure took a turn.
Anonymousse, this guy is a twerp. Shame it off.
Hans, go away and get counseling.
Boy, can’t understand why this girl and apparently every girl before her lost interest so quickly and gave very neutral reasons for not moving forward with you. You’re legit scary.
And now the anger, the name-calling, and the threats (“Go F yourselves with a catcus”? You’re a twerp). Yep, just like I remember from boys in college who didn’t like what they heard. And color me shocked that a forum full of men didn’t tell you that the way you are behaving is sexist. And, please: “Dear Wendy, I. DO. NOT. FEEL. ENTITLED. for anything. I feel like i need to know these things in order to deal with the situation, move on, and learn to get to know myself and my emotions.” That’s epitome of entitlement!! That you want something that isn’t being offered to you and so you continue to press for it it, calling it a NEED.” No, you don’t need it. You want it. And you keep pressing for it even though this girl has been pretty clear that she’s over you. MOA. MOVE ON ALREADY. Leave this girl alone.
Yeah, really not cool.
Oh gosh, I mean, it brings me back to so many times in college and post-college when a guy felt really entitled to not just my ongoing affection and time and interest — simply because I’d expressed a kernel of interest at some point in time — but to a clear explanation about why I was no longer interested. And that explanation had to spare his ego and somehow make it about how I’m really the problem (led him on, just don’t know what I want, am dishonest, etc.), all while imparting some lesson for him, some sort of feedback, so that he could improve his game for the next girl. The behavior is misogynistic. It reduces women to object to be won over. i.e. “The other guy charmed her more…”
I had a busy day yesterday and am just catching up on this thread now. On my. I’m in for a DDWKS bracelet, fyi.
Guess she saw you were out of the country and thought this would be a good time to troll again.
GET HELP. YOU ARE NO OK, this is not ok. It’s been going on for 2 1/2 years now! Aren’t you bored yet?
Yes, confirmed: all three have the same IP address.
In the short term, I would tell your mom congratulations on the new beach condo and you’re looking forward to seeing it some time, but right now you are busy settling in to your own new place so you’ll have to take a raincheck on driving up there with her.
I agree that you sound like you could benefit from some therapy. You obviously have a lot of issues with your parents, especially your dad. A therapist can help you work through your anger and hurt.
As for the apartment: congrats on the move up. I recently moved to a bigger place with my husband and two kids. It’s our first time owning a place and it’s much bigger and nicer than our last place, which was kind of a dump. We spent two years looking for this and it was a really stressful ordeal from start to finish. No one threw me a parade. It was a really big deal for us, but I didn’t expect anyone else to really care. I’m surprised you’d expect anyone to care all that much that you moved from a 500-sf rental to a 900-sf rental. It simply isn’t that big of a deal to anyone else. That your boyfriend’s parents drove 5 1/2 hours to help you move and paid for your security deposit is nice but it’s also a little… odd. Had he been sick or something? In a financial crisis? I’ve just never heard of a grown adult’s parents traveling so far and spending so much to help move from one rental to another unless there’s some sort of problem going (illness, divorce, mental problems, natural disaster, etc.) on or the kid is graduating from college and the move coincides with graduation or something like that.
Anyway, congrats on the move. Go see a therapist to help with your parent issues.
You have to decide if having a gun in your home, even with every safety precaution and act of responsibility taken, is a deal breaker for you. If it is, it is and you say so and tell your husband you’ll leave him if he gets one (the problem here though is that you’re still going to have to let your kids visit him and then you’re back to the problem: your kids being in a home with a gun). If it’s not a deal breaker, you hold him accountable to every safety precaution he’s promised to take. I’d be curious though why all of a sudden he feels the need for a gun, especially given our the national discourse around guns, and what that says about his values and how those might conflict or complement yours in general.
If it were me, I’d leave my husband if he got a gun and I’d do everything in my power to keep my kids out of his home. But that’s me, and I respect people’s choice to have guns and to marry someone who has guns.
