anonymousse
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Do you need instructions on how to flirt? We can provide those, and I’m not kidding or trying to be mean. I can imagine it’s been hard figuring this stuff out at your age, with how the state of world and schools have been the past two years. I’m serious and if I’m overstepping and that’s not something you need any help with, sorry in advance.
I didn’t actually need to know about your looks. It’s great you have them, that’s definitely in your favor.
My more important point was that you haven’t even spoken to him in person yet, right? Start there if you want possibly more than just sex. Just like another guy. Don’t treat him like a prize stud like all the other girls.
I’m also trying to say, if you just want sex, you see exactly how the other girls get a fling with him, if he’s into it. There’s an easy formula to follow. It’s not complicated.
Like didn’t you say you’ve seen him make out with different girls, they’ve asked him in groups for dates and hang all over him? That’s what works and what he likes. That would get the sex presuming you are also young and attractive.
It’s that some of your comments your sound morally superior to them. I’m not going to go back and read through. You think you’d be different to him. Maybe. I agree that it’s sounds like you do want more because you keep saying physical and see what else, which begs the question…
Have you ever spoken this guy? If not, start there. Ask him if he has an extra pen.
Have you asked guys out? Dated? Flirted?
Just curious, not shaming.
I think that’s what is so interesting, that she thinks she’s different from those other girls, or that they are loose but he’s not, he’s just can’t help all the attention and vagina that gets thrown his way.
KatieKat, you have no idea how often this guy has sex or what he does in his free time because you seem to only see him at school. So you really have no idea.
I agree that there is something off and little yuck about this. It’s not the sex thing, it’s that you don’t want to be used by the guy who uses lots of women, ergo don’t go there? You say you want to see if there’s more, but there’s not, there’s the exit because the next girl is walking over.
You can’t flirt in a classroom of others with the guy who has a crowd of girls around him and not appear like one of the adoring crowd. We’re just trying to prepare you for the distinct possibility that there may not be anything more, because as you’ve said, he sees a lot of different women and for never too long.
But if you’re fine with that, that’s cool.
Yes, jeez. Please use a condom and have had all your HPV vaccines.
Absolutely but she cannot see it. To him, you’re just another woman. Most guys in college with hordes of women flinging themselves at them don’t just happen to fall into that role. He likes he role. He loves the role.
You say these women objectify him, but so do you. I’m not saying this to shame you, just stop saying you have some greater interest in him. The interest is physical for you, right now. That’s all it is. He’s eye candy that has you dreaming of more.
elephant is right that scheming and pretending might get you sex but it’s not going to get him to know or like the real you.
What do you want? Sex? You said anything you could get you’d enjoy. Would you enjoy making out with him on Monday and seeing him kissing the next girl on Tuesday?
Talk to him. Stop scheming and planning and just talk to him, if you can beat back the crowd of admirers.
I understand the LUST crush. I had one in high school. I actually got him to drive me home one day and I realized his IQ was smaller than my shoe size and that killed it for me.
You also need to assume he’s loving them and leaving them if you’ve seen this happen often. I mean, he sounds like he gets around, not that that is a bad thing, but that doesn’t really sound like what you want? Maybe you do, so keep the expectations realistic. It’s okay, he’s young and hot. Live it up. But don’t expect you to be the magic one to stick around. He’s young and hot and has a lot of options and takes advantage of them.
I would maybe try for a guy who isn’t constantly covered in other women.
“He then asked why this makes me feel so uncomfortable and why I’m know saying I want my name to be on the lease.”
It’s a bad sign when wanting to know the reasons for things that make no sense are whittled down to “making you feel uncomfortable.” It’s a lot of money that you know he wouldn’t just hand to you and trust you with it. You shouldn’t have to prove your trustworthiness!
Wanting your name on the lease is not weird or strange. If he was asking a male friend to move in, they’d want their name on the lease to establish their rental history. Otherwise YOU aren’t paying rent, he is and you’re just living with him and he can kick you out. And you’ll have no way to prove your a good renter if your if your name is not on the lease. He gets all the benefits and you get nothing out of this! Nothing.
